


Swapped

by Darkness_Hunter



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: 2nd mother Zoe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, And Alana, Anxiety, Connor Hansen, Evan Murphy, Evan sounds better with connor's last name lol, Everyone has a potty mouth, Homophobic Slurs, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Including the Author, M/M, Panic Attacks, Rating May Change, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Slut Shaming, So that's a thing, Swapped personality au, feminine clothing on males, happy end, may get a bit smutty later, self-harm mention, shitfucktittytit, sorry - Freeform, they also swapped parents
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-08
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-11-11 11:31:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11147535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkness_Hunter/pseuds/Darkness_Hunter
Summary: “Dear Conner Hansen,Turns out today wouldn't be a great day, or a great week, or even a great year because why would it be?"Or in other words, the swapped personalities/parents AU that no one wanted but here you fuckin' go.





	1. What a Shit Day

_Click tick tap. Click Click._

_“Dear Connor Hansen,_

_Today is going to be a good day and here’s why, it’s the first day of your senior year and everything is going to turn out well!”_

No, no, no. That sounds weird.

_“Everything is going to turn out great!”_

Too fake.

_“Awesomely.”_

Unnatural.

_“Fabulously.”_

Not going to even comment on that one.

_“Dear Connor Hansen,_

_Today is...”_

Connor glided his left, non-broken, hand through his hair, groaning in irritation. Just what the hell is he supposed to say? Everything he can think of just sounds terrible and, well, unnatural.  Connor decided to finish the letter once he arrives at school, his thoughts were suddenly cut by his mother’s steps coming downstairs with his sister, Zoe.

“Good morning, honey! Have you been writing those letters to yourself? _‘Dear Connor Hansen, today is going to be a good day and here’s why…’_ ” His mother, Heidi, asked in bit of a “yadda yadda” tone.

“I started one.” Connor groaned. Well, it’s a bitch to write but he did start one. Why couldn’t his therapist said to draw it out? Therapeutic drawings instead of letters, Connor has never had the best grasp of saying his feelings let alone a diary of it. Drawing them out usually makes him feel safe but, that’s why he’s is supposed to write it. To be able to write this stupid shit out.

“Those letters are important, honey. They’re going to help you build your self-confidence. Oh, maybe you can ask some kids to sign your cast.” Mom really was trying after their dad left. She’s trying to support two kids with two jobs while going to law school after all. Connor felt bad for her. _He was just a mess and to leave him and his sister in their mom’s hands? If only he succeeded in…_

“Mom, this is _Connor_ we’re talking about. He can barely even talk let alone write out his feelings.” Zoe’s words cut through Connor’s thoughts as she looked through the fridge for the milk. Well, she isn’t wrong. Connor never spoke too often, _he’ll probably start making the person he talks to angry somehow._

“ _Zoe_ , you know he’s trying. Don’t listen to her honey, it’s time for the both of you to get to school. I’m proud of you already.” Their mother gave Connor a reassuring smile and a kiss on the cheek to both of them as she grabbed her purse and left for work.

“Oh, good…” Connor sighed and decided it was time for them to-- He has to get out of there.

“Connor! Why bother leaving the milk in the fridge when you finished it! You jerk!” But Connor was already out the door before she could finish her sentence. Great, time to head to the sweat filled, rowdy ass bus.

 _What a shitty day already._ ****


	2. This Isn't Some Movie

“It’s your senior year, Evan, you are not missing the first day.”

“I already decided I am going tomorrow.” Evan said as a matter of factly as he grabbed his toast, ignoring his mother’s cooking of the day. Man, it just did not look edible, well, vegan food usually doesn’t.

“He doesn’t listen. Just look at his clothes, dresses like some one cent whore.” Evan growled as his father, Larry, made yet another reason why Evan is a disappointment.

“Larry!” His mother could never win against his dad, Evan loved her dearly but she was a bit of a pushover. Not to mention, she tends to avoid the issues right in front of her to avoid any conflict. This irritates Evan to the damn core, he just wishes she could see the obvious problems that are clearly in her face.

“He should be dressing more like a man! Not like some fag off the streets!” Fucking. Larry. That fucking asshole. Evan did not want to be in that damn house anymore if he has to hear anymore of Larry’s fucking complaints. **He didn’t want to hear what he already knows.**

“On second thought, I guess I will be going to school.” Evan said bitterly as he swung on his backpack and left the house without another word, a slam to the door for good measure. Even once he’s out of the house, he can hear the constant, never-ending bickering between his parents. From Larry’s callings of having a ‘Whore son’  to his mother simply denial to everything and how ‘Evan is just a normal kid, he’ll grow up sooner or later.’ That is what movies would call a teenage phase. But Evan knew better. Evan knew that he was fucked in the head.

And that he is not some normal kid that’ll ‘grow up’.

**This isn’t some damn movie!**

Evan growled as he got into his car and drove to school.  That damn school he wish he had never gone to. It’s completely stupid. Everything was so easy, why even bother doing anything? Evan surely doesn’t do jack shit in class and when a test comes and he gets a top score, everyone is so damn surprised. **Wow, the slut really can think after all.**

He finally arrived at that dreaded school, heading towards his locker, trying to avoid any and all uncomfortable stares he could. Only to come face to face with **Jared Fucking Kleinman** and his lackey, who looked as if he was hyperventilating at the mere sight of Evan. Was Evan that disgusting to look at? What was so wrong with Evan that made the boy so disgusted?! Oh, who was the slut kidding? Evan knew **exactly** what is wrong with himself.

**What a shitty day already.**


	3. Don't Fuck This Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Quit fuckin’ laughing at me!” 
> 
> “I-I wasn’t--” 
> 
> “You think I’m a goddamn slut too, don’t you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Lookit that, it's meeting time and Jared is a bit of an ass. I mean, this is still the beginning so of course he's an assy clown rn. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ Also Alana makes a cameo rn cause I don't have the best grasp of her personality, so if anyone would be willing to describe her to me, I would love you forever and appreciate it!

Once Connor finally arrived at school, he was greeted by a girl, that student leader girl… The one that is dating his sister, Connor was never one to remember names, he was always better with faces.

“Hi! How was your summer?” _Don’t fuck this up, don’t fuck this up,  don’t fuck this up,  don’t fuck this u--_

“Mine was productive! I did three internships and ninety hours of community service!” Looks like he didn’t even have to say much to fuck up. But, man, this girl really was active.

“Wow…”

“I know, wow.”

“Hey, um--”

“Even though I was so busy, I still made some great friends-- well, acquaintances more like.” Wow, this one is a talker, but Connor’s mom did say to be more confident…

“Th-that’s great… Hey, um. Would you, uh--”

“Woah, what happened to your arm?” Finally, an opening.

“I, uh, broke it when I climbed--”

“Oh, my grandma broke her hip--” At this point Connor had stopped listening to the girl. The only things he remembers hearing was something about “died” and “having a great day.” Whiplash much?

“Hey, Connor! Loving that hair, always so school shooter chic, man.” _Oh_. Connor had almost forgot about Jared Kleinman, his “family friend”, as the other loved to remind him every time. Connor just ignored Jared’s comment about his hair and said a simple good morning.

“Hey, is it weird to be the first person in history to break their arm from jerking off too much or do you consider that an honor?” _Please stop._

“W-w-woah, hold up--” Man, the person in the sky must hate Connor’s voice.

“I mean, paint me the picture, you’re in your freaky bedroom and you’re on some hot guy’s pornhub page on your dumb little iphone--” Yeah, not dealing with this shit on the first day.

“That’s not what happened! I just… Fell from a tree.”

“Oh my god, that’s hilarious! Mr. tree over here fell from a tree! What are you? Like, some sorta tall acorn?” Great, Jared is laughing at him like usual. It doesn’t help that Connor might as well qualify as a tree himself considering his height. Wait, shit, he needs to explain why he even in the tree in the first place, fuck, uh.

“Well, uh, over the summer I volunteered-- well, forced more like, to help out in a park and, uh--” Connor is praying that Jared is buying this. “ A kid happened to fly his toy plane into this forty foot tree--”

“So you helped the kid?”

“I managed to, uh, get the plane out of the branch… Myself included… The kid screamed. The ambulance came about ten to twenty minutes after the kid ran away.” Connor finally mumbled out.

“Jesus Christ, man.” Jared finally said, still looking a bit skeptical. I mean, who can blame him? What kind of kid plays with a plane now? But, Jared didn’t look like he was going to question Connor any further. _Here comes that awkward silence._

“So, uh, how was your summer?” Connor finally asked the other boy, only to hear another ramble. At least he wasn’t getting cut off this time.

“So, guess that answers your question.” Jared said as he turned around. Wait, Connor’s cast! At the very least his family friend could sign it, even if that didn’t quite count.

“H-hey, uh, would you want to sign my cast?” Connor sputtered out. _Cool, dude. Real cool._

“Why are you asking me?” … What? Jared had the most confused look on his face.

“Cause I, uh, thought since we were, um, friends--”

“We’re **_family_** friends. That’s, like, a whole different thing and you know it.” Oh. Yeah. The grand old **_family_** friends deal, _god, Connor felt stupid._

“Hey, make sure to tell your mom that I was nice to you so my mom can pay for my car insurance.” A pat to the back. _All pity. Always with that damn car insurance--_

“Hey Evan, you know, I am lovin’ that new sex top. Totally says ‘ _I love to suck dick behind a 7-11 at 4 o’cock’_ , it fits you just perfectly.” _Oh, shit_ . Jared, you fucking dumbass! Connor and Jared was faced with Evan Murphy, who Jared fondly nicknames _‘slut of the school’_.

If Connor had to be honest, ‘slut’ would not be how he would describe Evan. In fact, Evan was surprisingly pretty, amazingly actually, he always looked like he takes quite a while to make sure he looks great. Connor just can’t believe how feminine a male body can look, from Evan’s curves, to his nice thighs, hell, he even makes bubble gum fuckin’ sexy with those plush looking-- _No! Stop it! Connor was not thinking about this!_ Oh, fuck, get outta your head captain stupid because Evan is glaring big time.

“I was just… Kidding. It was a joke?” Wow, even Jared was surprised at that glare.

“Yeah, I am well aware of what a joke is. I’m laughing, can’t you tell?” Yeah, that was no laugh. In fact, if looks could kill, Jared would be dead ten-- no, a hundred times over.

“Do you want me to laugh harder?”

“... Whatever, slut.” Jared walked away from the conversation before any fight could ensue. The whole exchange made Connor feel a lump in his throat, like he was going to throw up-- no, wait, he was going to cough. _Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Don’t cough, don’t cough, don’t cough, don’t cough_ \--

“Ahem.”

_Fuck…_

“What the fuck’re you laughin’ at?” _Oh fucking shit_ , Connor was going to die on his first day of school. He should have written a will if he knew this was going to happen.

“Quit fuckin’ laughing at me!” Evan walked towards the other boy. _Zoe can keep his old tee-shirts._

“I-I wasn’t--” A step back. _He shouldn’t have drank all the milk._

“You think I’m a goddamn slut too, don’t you?” The shorter boy was even closer now. Man, Evan’s eyes looked amazing-- _Fucking hell Connor, you are about to be killed and that is what you think about your soon to be killer?!_

“No, I was--”

“I’m not a fucking slut! You’re a fucking freak!” Connor felt a strong push on his chest, almost knocking out all the air in his lungs. Then he was on the school floors. For someone who looked like a gremlin next to Connor, he was fucking strong. He heard the other’s footsteps move further and further away as he continued to stay on the floor, defeated. This was going to be a terrible fucking day… _Time for class, loser. Get up._

Good thing the first period is his study hall. Well, he might as well go to the library and type his letter.

_“Dear Conner Hansen,_

_Turns out today wouldn't be a great day, or a great week, or even a great year because why would it be? You were just pushed down in the hall by the “School Slut”.  As Jared likes to call him. ‘Slut’… Why does Jared have to be such a fuckin’ asshole all the time? Evan looks way too pretty to be considered a “slut”. But, what can_ **_you_ ** _even do? You’re, well,_ **_you._ ** _You couldn't say a word to save your damn life, as that push eloquently  taught_ _you._

_It would be great if anything you did even mattered to someone, like if something you said would be important. But, it’s not like anyone would notice if you were to, say, **disappear** tomorrow. _

_Sincerely, your best and dearest friend,_

_Me”_

Printing.


	4. It's Getting Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Is… Is this how you see me?” Connor can see the glimmer of hopefulness in Evan’s eyes, along with…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I'm so happy with all the positive words I've been getting from everyone and I really appreciate it! Wohoo, pictures in this chapter~ Also, I was able to finish designing Evan and Connor here: https://goo.gl/IXybFW , I kinda got lazy and didn't color Connor... sorry.
> 
> Oh also, warning, angst will be in the next chapter with a resolve.

Connor hasn’t drawn much of anything since he fell. Maybe he can calm down? He decided to do some quick sketches while waiting for his letter to print, he took out his sketchbook from his messenger bag. Feels dusty.

_Scratch scratch. Scritch scritch. Squeak squeak. Scratch._

 

The figure he drew was an elegant person with a feminine body but has hints of actually being male, with flowers growing in their short hair as some petals fell, wearing a sad expression, and was mid-blow on a bubble… Did… Did Connor just draw Evan? The guy who pushed him down literally twenty minutes back? How about a different page?

_Scratch scratch. Squeak squeak. Scratch._

__

This newly drawn adorable figure also had short hair, with their hands holding up their said face, showing off their semi pudgy cheeks, and had the most happiest expression on their face which can be clearly seen behind the large bubble the said figure was blowin-- Um? What the fuck is wrong with Connor? He drew that _him_ again! Just what the fuck is going on? All Connor can think of is Evan. _Evan, Evan, Evan,_ _Evan_ _\--_

“Hey.” Shit,  that voice startled Connor. He looked at the source of the voice.

**_Evan Murphy._ **

“So, uh, what happened to your arm?” Oh, yeah. Shit, uh.

“I, um, fell out of a tree…”

“A tree?” Connor nodded silently as he closed his sketchbook, attempting to obscure the pictures he had drawn of Evan. If Connor got pushed for a cough, who knows what would happen if he showed the other boy his creepy drawings? _He’ll probably think of Connor as a freak. Oh, who was he kidding? Evan probably already does._

“That might be one of the saddest things I’ve heard today.” _Pop_. Connor watched as Evan rechewed the popped bubble go back into his lips. Man, what would he give to feel those-- Goddammit! What the fuck!

“Hello? Anyone there in headville?” Shit, Connor spaced out.

“Oh, uh, sorry, what were you saying?”

“I noticed no one’s signed your cast yet.”

“Oh, yeah.” _Great, Evan is going to make fun of Connor for sure._ _Good old no-friends Hansen over here!_

“Maybe, I can sign it?” … What? Did Connor fall into a coma back there? Nope, not dreaming.

“Y-you don’t have to do that…” This has to be some sort of joke. _Who’d want to even be near someone like Connor?_

“Do you have a sharpie?” Well, Evan seems dead set on this, might as well comply. Seriously, when would Connor ever get a chance like this ever again? So, he handed Evan the sharpie he has been holding, at last, it is finally out of that bag, Evan then grabbed Connor’s broken arm a little too roughly, causing the poor boy to mutter an ‘ow’. Man, how is Evan so damn strong? He looks like one of those teen girls that can be broken in half with a pat of the back.

“Sorry…” The shorter boy apologized quietly, seemingly more focused on signing the cast than the actual person that was hurt. Oh, Evan was done…

 _Oh._ What Connor sees was an extremely large, almost annoyingly, cursive “EVAN” on his arm… At least cursive makes it look pretty? Oh, hell, who was he kidding? He just wants to erase it already.

“Oh… Great. Thanks...” Connor muttered, trying to give the other boy a small smile. _Stop giving out such an ugly, fake smile._

“Well, now we can both pretend to have friends.” Evan said, looking away from the other bashfully. Huh, so he can act cute… At this point, Connor’s conscience is too tired to even stop those thoughts, today has been a tiring enough ride for him already.  He got up from his seat, only to drop his sketchbook near Evan’s boots.

“Oh, you dropped something.”  Evan bent down to pick pick up the book. _Please don’t look, please don’t look, please don’t look, please don’t look._

“Wow, do you draw? The only thing I can draw that would be considered good would be trees and shit.” Evan said as he handed the sketch book to Connor’s nervous hands. _Phew, Connor might not be hated after all._

“O-oh, um yeah. I kinda specialize more in drawing people and animals rather than nature. But, I do try to practice.” Connor laughed nervously.

“Hey, um, do you mind if I… Took a look?” Evan asked just as nervously. Why is he nervous? Connor is the one who should be more nervous. He can’t afford to--

“S-sure.”

_… Connor, you shit head._

The taller boy handed his sketchbook to the other boy, their hands grazed a bit but Evan didn’t seem to notice it. Or maybe he just didn’t care? Either way, Connor’s heart seemed to beat faster with every page flip.

“These are really good! Wow, I mean, it’s kind of breathe taking.”

_Flip._

“Man, you should go to an art college, they’d accept you instantly!”

_Flip._

_Flip. It’s getting closer, Connor._

_Flip._

“I mean, really! You sho--” Silence… Connor just wanted to die.

“Is… Is this me?” Connor didn’t answer.

_Flip._

“It’s me again…” The second one kind of hurt Connor.

“I-I, uh--” Connor was stumbling at this point.

“I look really pretty…” Evan looked at Connor, who was shocked to hear the word ‘pretty’ be uttered instead of an insult.  

“Is… Is this how you see me?” Connor can see the glimmer of hopefulness in Evan’s eyes, along with… Sadness?

“ Oh! U-um, ye-yeah. I do. Uh, you just look really pretty to me and I find it really breathtaking and it’s amazing how someone can look so nice in such feminine clothing and--” Before Connor could speed ramble anymore, Evan cut him off.

“Ok, Speedy Gonzalez, no need to start rambling so much, I’m not too into that.” He chuckled, man, even that was pretty to Connor. “But, I am into these drawings. They’re really pretty… **I** look pretty.” Evan wore a small sad smile on his face as his ocean blue eyes looked a bit glassy. Connor can only stare at Evan at that moment, the boy truly did not expect his sketches to be so loved by a muse who he did not even get permission to draw. Connor felt a bit of a foreign warmth within his chest.

“Oh, sorry, I almost forgot.” Evan snapped out of his own little world and placed the book down. He took out the sheet of paper that was under his arm. Wait… **_That fucking letter!_ **

“Is this yours?” _No, no, no, no!_ “It has your name, Connor Hansen, ri--” _Fuck, fuck, fuck! Connor was so close! So. Damn. Close!_

“‘School Slut’...?”

 


	5. What Has Connor Gotten Himself Into?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Th-that’s not it!” 
> 
> “Then what the fuck do you want from me if not that?! Why else would anyone want to be near a fucking slut like me?! Well?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey heyyyy guess who is on school computers and uploading the newest chapterrrr? This idiot, also I heard about the Tony awards for Dear Evan Hansen and that is very, very wonderful.  
> But I am very tired and just wanna go home. It's too hot right now where I live. I might melt.
> 
> P.S Evan gets a bit handsy here, just thought I'd like to warn you all cause... Bad touch.

Connor could only look away from Evan. _Why the fuck did you say that, let alone type it out?! Do you ever think about_ **_anything_ ** _?!_

“... So, is that all it was?” Connor looked up at Evan. _Shit…_ The other boy was on the brink of tears.

“You knew I was going to be in here…” _No._

“You just **faked** being friendly with me,” _Stop it._

“Just so you can see my face when I find this **damn letter** !” _That’s not it!_

“N-no. It’s just so--”

“What the fuck **else** would it be?! You **sadistic** fuck! Y-you… Fucking **_freak_**!” Evan ran out the library door with Connor’s letter. _No, no, no. He’ll show the whole school that damn thing!_ Connor ran after the other boy, the bell rang, but he doesn’t remember what period was next, nor did he care, all he knows is that _he needs that letter_.

He finally followed Evan to the restrooms, Connor slowly opened the door. The empty restroom was filled with the poor boy’s weeps, Connor could feel his heart breaking. _What is wrong with you, you useless, little, good for nothing?!_

“U-um… E-Evan? Are-- Are you in here?” Connor managed to muster out in this seemingly empty, echoey boy’s restroom. The soft sobbing stops for a second, only to hear Evan’s broken voice.

“W-why’d you follow me? God, y-you really **hic** really are some sor- sorta sadistic **hic** freak…” As if Connor’s heart couldn’t break any further.  But, he has to find Evan, he needs that letter.

“Evan. Please come out.” Connor manages to not stutter to his own surprise.

“W- **hic** why should I? You’re probably gonna try something again…” Connor took a breath. _F_ o _ur seconds in and four out, like your therapist suggested._

“... Therapy.” Connor uttered out.

“Wh- What are you--”

“I write those letters for my therapy appointments. I-it’s like a daily diary.” The boy concluded, trying to breathe from trying to catch up to Evan.

“Do those letters require you to tell them how much of a **slut** I am?” Connor could feel that comment pierce through his flesh and his stomach churning.

“I-I wrote more about you in there… R-read all of it... ” Connor said. As much as he hates the idea of someone other than his therapist reading those letters, it seems like the only way out of this situation.

“Great, more things about how I’m just a fucking--” Silence once more. Connor can feel his heart beating out of his chest, when suddenly the last stall door slowly creaked open to reveal a little Evan with some smudged make up from crying and a lowered head. The other boy looked even smaller to Connor now. Evan slowly wobbled up to Connor and looked the taller boy in the face, his eyes red and puffy, and bite marks on his plush lips.

“What do you want with me?” Evan finally said to Connor, who looked confused at the question asked.

“I-I mean, you never seem to talk to me before, let alone notice me… Why the sudden interest?” Connor didn’t know how to answer that question because he wasn’t quite sure himself, he looked down at his shoes, avoiding eye contact. Why _was_ he suddenly so interested in Evan _now_? The silence between the two was almost painful at this point.

“I think I get it…” Evan finally said as he suddenly wrapped his arms around Connor’s neck, causing the other boy to look at Evan’s tear dried face. _What? What did he mean by that? Was there something Connor was just missing here? What is happening?_

“You and little **asshole** Jared planned this all out. You both knew the rumors were true and decided to test it out.” Evan said softly as he slowly moved one of his hands to Connor’s chest. _Wh-no, really, what the hell is going on?! Everything was going way too fast to Connor._

“And what do you know? You have the devil’s luck. You have me all alone in the restroom with you. So,” Evan’s hand that rested on Connor’s chest started to slowly move south further until…

Oh.

_Oh._

Connor then realize what Evan was getting at and it is _way_ too early to be dealing with this kind of thing. So, before Evan could speak or get any further, Connor pushed him away.  

“Th-that’s not it!” Even Connor was shocked at the loudness of his own voice, but he had to put a stop at this situation somehow. Evan’s face was mixed with both confusion and anger.

“Then what the fuck do you want from me if not that?! Why else would anyone want to be near a fucking **slut** like me?! Well?!” Connor winced at the words, but, he has to get it through to to Evan somehow.

“I-I don’t have any friends either! I-I can barely do anything right without m-messing it up somehow! A-and the only ‘f-friend’ I have is Jared who always says we’re just fa- family friends! N-nothing more! So, I-I’m just a _b-b-broken_ wreck that can’t do anything right or even make one real friend!” Connor was trying to breathe from his sudden outburst. That was the longest he had to speak to anyone, even his therapist couldn’t get that much out of him. Evan stood there shocked as the other boy now had tears flowing from his face and was on his knees, trying to curl up into a ball to hide from the world. Evan got down to his knees and tried to put his hand on the crying boy’s back, attempting to calm the other down.

“Um. It… It’s going to be fine.” Evan awkwardly said as he tried to rub circles on the other boy’s back. What? Evan was never put in such a situation before, what was he supposed to say? **Come on you fucking idiot, say something! You caused this you fucking dumbass. Might as well finally do something with your life.**

“H-Hey… L-look at me.” Evan finally said, trying not to alarm the other boy further. Getting the boy to finally look at Evan with large tears rolling down his face and the occasional hics and sniffles. Evan gulped, what does he say next? There was a good ice cream place that he knows, maybe Evan can take him there for a breather? And maybe get some answers out of him after he calms down. “ How about we ditch this place? You sure as hell look like you need a break.” Evan concluded as he got back up and offered Connor his hand.

“B- _hic_ \- but, i-it’s school hours…” Connor muttered as he accepted Evan’s hand. _Soft, but cold._ Evan sighed.

“At this point, that is the least of our worries, we both need a fucking break. Clean up your face cause we’re heading out and we don't want you all teary eyed and snot faced.” Evan replied before Connor wobbled to the sink to splash some water. **Dammit, that might have been too harsh. Way to fuckin’ go jackass.** Once Connor was done, Evan waited for the other at the door.

“Let’s hurry up before the security is back, he is usually back at eight thirty, we have about five minutes to book it, alright? Oh, and we also have to go a certain path so the outside cameras don’t catch us. Luckily for you, there are only two cameras… With long range. Just follow my lead to my car. Got it?”

“U-um, y-yeah…” Connor decides not to ask how Evan knows about all that information about sneaking out the school and just do as he is told like a good boy. _Hopefully, he can do something right today._ Especially, if it is to please Evan right now. Honestly, he feels like he would do anything to make Evan happy.

Except, _very_ illegal things like run a human trafficking scheme, he will not do that for sure. Or smoke drugs… That did not come out right. Oh, and-- and Evan has already grabbed his arm and dragged him outside, currently hiding from a camera. For someone who seems like they just doesn’t give give a shit about the school, they sure seem to know quite a bit about the school’s parameters. Actually, now that Connor has a clear head, why are they sneaking around in the first place?! What if his mom finds-- no… No, no, no, no… What if _Zoe_ finds out? _What_ has Connor gotten himself into?


	6. What The Fuck Was That?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What the fuck was that?” Evan looked at the other boy in surprise, not used to hearing the other swear. Evan actually felt a bit proud.
> 
> “Wow, looks like the sprout is finally growing into a tree.” Evan chuckled at his little metaphor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heheh, we are getting to the part where the story upload times are gonna be slowing down, sorry about that. Not to mention , I am getting close to my finals so my head is all sorts of scrambled, I'm really sorry about this!

Connor has finally gotten through that hell and is currently looking at an Evan Murphy with a face stuffed with what looks like every flavor A La Mode has to offer with a waterfall of caramel on top, like, an ungodly amount, it is diabetes in a sundae glass. The boy reminds Connor of a little chipmunk storing food for the winter. An ice cream, diabetes filled winter for chipmunk Evan.

“So, what the fuck’re you hanging with the ‘ **insanely annoying** ’ Jared Klineman? You don't seem like an asshole like him, in fact, it looks like he drags you into his mess while to take the blame,” You know, Evan would sound much more professional if his face was not stuffed with 20 different flavors of ice cream or the fact that they are in an ice cream place in the first place. “Are there any inaccuracies to my claim?” Connor looked down nervously at his fiddling hands, as nice as this place is, the whole situation feels like some sort of talk with the sugar police.

“Y-you sound like y-you’re interrogating me…”

“So, you can talk back. Good to know I won’t be speaking to someone who is totally meek.” Evan said as he ate another spoonful of caramel, the caramel to ice cream ratio is astounding considering Evan literally chose all the flavors of ice cream the parlor had. Connor just shot the other boy a sad look.

“H-hey, t-that just means you’ll be more interesting to speak to. You know?” Connor only looked at the diabetes mountain Evan calls a sundae.

“I guess… W-we really shouldn’t be here.” Connor finally mumbled. Evan bit his lip.

“No, we **should** be here. That place is practically killing the both of us, especially--” Connor’s phone rang, the longer haired boy reached for his phone. _It was Jared_ **_fucking_ ** _Klinemen._ Connor looked nervously at Evan for an answer only to see Evan with a grumpy face and stuffing said face with ice cream.

“Is it **Jared**? Speak of the fuckin’ devil,” Evan took another spoonful to his face. “Just take the damn call.” Evan sighed as he looked at his sundae with an irritable expression. Connor just nodded as he took the call… Only to get an earful.

 _“Where the fuck are you? I literally saw you this morning.”_ Jared’s angry tone shook up Connor a bit.

“I-I’m, uh… In the…” Wow, this boy really can’t lie, the scared boy looked at Evan, who mouthed the word ‘home’ to Connor. “Home! Oh, uh, home. I’m at h-home…” Connor finally said, Evan could only place his face into his hands and sigh. Why did he bring Connor with him?

“N-n-n-no! I-I’m not lying! F-f-f-for sure!” Oh. Yeah. Cause the stress from every little thing kills him from the inside out. Evan was tired of this exchange and decides to take matters into his own hands. Literally. Evan grabbed the cell from Connor’s sweaty hands, who flinched at the action.

“Connor fucking hates you, ok? Bye, asshole.”

“ _What the fu--Evan Mur--”_ Evan hung up before Jared could annoy him more than he already has, Connor could only look at Evan in shock. _What the_ **_fuck_ ** _just happened?_ Evan handed Connor his phone back, looking away from the other boy.

“Um, you’re welcome.” Evan finally said as he quickly gone back to stuffing the almost fully melted ice cream into his face. Yeah, Connor is _not_ going to let this one go.

“What the fuck was that?” Evan looked at the other boy in surprise, not used to hearing the other swear. Evan actually felt a bit proud.

“Wow, looks like the sprout is finally growing into a tree.” Evan chuckled at his little metaphor.

“T-that is not the point, j-just what happened there?” Evan looked at the other boy with a dumbfounded look, as if the answer was obvious.

“You were clearly distressed, I just decided to make the source to the stress stop.” The ice cream chipmunk simply said. Connor still didn’t understand, who would help _him_? He is just some kid who can’t do anything. He can’t even order pizza for himself, he just starves himself like a dumbass until Zoe orders for him out of annoyance. He just mopes around about not having friends, why would Evan even try? In fact, Connor was the cause of Evan’s breakdown today? How does Evan not hate Connor’s guts?

“Why are you being so nice to me?”

“Wh--”

“Why are _you_ being so nice to _me_?” Connor firmly asked. He need the answer, there has to me something in it for Evan. Evan must have been dared to do this somehow.

“Uh, well. Um. Because we aren’t **that** different. Really similar actually.” Evan simply said while playing with what is left of the ice cream soup. Connor was still having trouble wrapping his head around all of this. **Evan** is similar to _Connor_ ? _That just seems like a bad joke Jared would make._ The shorter boy can see the confusion in Connor’s eyes, Evan sighed and got up from his seat.

“Let me take you somewhere else.  I have to show you something.”


	7. I Want to Be Your Prince

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, thats true but he seemed genuinely upset. The last time he was this upset was when his mom found out about him chomping on bathbombs. You remember that right?

_Oh god, is Evan going to kill Connor? Shit, shit, shit. Evan is going to take Connor out back and shoot him, old yeller style._

“Well, we’re here. Come out, you beanpole.” It’s the abando-- wait, beanpole?

“I’m not that much taller you know.” Connor said with a pout as he got out of the nice car. Wait, Connor recognized that secluded tall tree, it’s _that_ tree. His face twisted into a painful grimace at the memory.

“That’s only ‘cause of my heels. Anyways, I usually come here when I need some peace from… Well, everything.” Evan sighed as he sat under the tall tree, silently taking note of Connor’s changed expression. Evan just patted a space next to himself, asking Connor to sit. So the other did, with a weary expression.

“What’s with the face?” Evan asked, tired of seeing Connor’s face scrunched up. “It’s not like the tree is going to eat you or something.”

“I-it’s nothing. I just… I-I’m not really a nature person.” Connor said, looking down at the vibrant green grass.

“Yet you injure yourself from falling down a tree?” Evan said skeptically. Shit, he might be onto Connor. Fuck, fuck. Do _not_ fuck this up. He _cannot_ learn what happened, _he’ll hate you, he’ll be disgusted and tell everyone about it._

“I was just helping this kid get his toy from the tree and I… I fell.” Connor manages to spit out his answer, not making eye contact with the other. The two sat in silence in what felt like forever.

“I really am like you, you know.” Evan finally spoke as he felt Connor’s hand near his own. Connor looked at the other, Evan’s eyes looked gentle but sad.

“A somewhat mess. Like, feeling if you were to disappear tomorrow, no one would care.” Evan softly said as he slowly held Connor’s hand. “I would know best of all.” Evan looked at the setting sun. **Don’t do it. He’ll be disgusted with you. Don’t even bother. Stop holding his hand.** Evan sat up straight, letting go of the other’s soft hand.

“I-is something wrong?” Connor asked, noticing the shift of movement from Evan. The boy only sat in silence. _He’s going to say something terrible about you. He’s tired of all your shit right now._

“There’s something I...” Evan’s mumble cut through the quietness. The boy hesitated. He couldn’t bring himself to tell the other. **Disgusting. Wow, you thought you could actually make friends using those grotesque marks of yours?** **That would have actually been funny, but it’s only pathetic coming from you.**

“N-nothing. I just like the trees here is all.” Well, Evan isn’t wrong. He always loved coming here to see the variety of trees in this area. But suddenly, Connor jolted up. _Mom. Zoe._

“I-I-I-I completely forgot about telling mom or Zoe!” Connor started to breathe quickly. His phone. Where is his phone?! Connor quickly fumbled through his pockets to find his phone only to see many, _many_ missed texts from Zoe.

**_Zoe:_ **

_Hey, con, you alright? I saw you get pushed by the schools resident gremlin on heels. Text me back, mmk?_

_Hey con. Where are you? I saw you this morning and Alana did too. You barely skip school unless something bad happened and mom said you she cant pick you up cause she has to take someones shift. Please text back._

_Ok, con what the fuck?_

_Connor where the fuck are you?!_

_Connor, Jared just told me you were with Murphy. Connor don’t tell me you payed for sex. Were you kiddnapped? TEXT BACK_

_Connor! I’m seriously worried here! Are you dead, are you alive? What the fuck_

Oh. Oh boy… Connor was in deep shit. He has to text back _now. He made his little sister worry about him. Some older brother he was._

“Um. Is Zoe your sister?” Evan gently placed a hand on the other’s back, attempting to comfort the nervous wreck.

“Tell her that your phone was off or something and you just headed home on your own. That should work, right?” Evan suggested. That seems like a good enough excuse, let’s hope Zoe buys it.

**_Connor:_ **

_Hey Zoe. I wasn’t feeling good so I just went home and I was asleep the whole day…_

**_Zoe:_ **

_Oh god con youre alive oh my god. But Jared said you were with Murphy? He seemed extra salty about it too, like, he was all angry and shit_

**_Connor:_ **

_I don’t know anything about that. Maybe, it’s one of his pranks again or something. He doesn’t like Evan at all, remember?_

**_Zoe:_ **

_Yeah, thats true but he seemed genuinely upset. The last time he was this upset was when his mom found out about him chomping on bathbombs. You remember that right?_

Connor chuckled at the memory. That whole ordeal was rather funny, it wasn’t for Jared though. But, right now is not the time for reminiscing, Connor has to get home ASAP so Zoe and his mom doesn’t suspect a thing.

**_Connor:_ **

_Heheh, yeah. Hey, do you have Jazz practice today?_

**_Zoe:_ **

_Yeah, I do. Its gonna be an hour and a half long today since, you know, that school concert is coming up. Man, sometimes I hate the concerts sometimes._

**_Connor:_ **

_Heheh, guess I’m lucky._

**_Zoe:_ **

_You sure as hell are ya dunce._

Connor let out a sigh of relief, he has some time to get home.

“You gotta get home?” Evan asked with a slight look of sadness in his eyes. Connor nodded and told Evan the address, he has to go right now if he doesn’t want to get yelled at. They quickly headed to the car and Connor fucking swears that the ride back was the scariest car ride he has ever had. Everything was going way too fast for Connor and they might have ran a red light, he can’t see the speed of fucking light and finally he was home. In one piece. Connor might have swallowed his vomit there.

“Well, you’re home, princess.” Evan nervously chuckled. Are they friends now or something? The two don’t even know. But what Connor does know is that he is not some delicate flower.

“I’m no-not the princess.”

“Well, I mean I did drive you and stuff like a prince would for their princess.” Evan teased further.  Evan is starting to like this teasing friends thing.

“But. You’re the pretty one. I want to be your prince.” Connor said without thinking. Evan stopped chuckling and looked at Connor in surprise.

“Wait, what--” Connor realized what he had said and got out of the car as fast as he could, red as a beet.

“T-t-th-thank you for the d-d-d-dr-drive home!” Connor yelled from his front porch as he dropped his keys a few times and slammed the front door. Evan could only look at the Hansen’s household in awe.

**What the ever living fuck was that?**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, sorry I haven't been updating that frequently, This week is my Finals so unfortunately this is the only chapter you will be getting this week, but I'll make sure to try updating on a... better schedule. Also, wow, Jared sure loves bath bombs.
> 
> Edit: Next week I'll be going on a trip out of state so I will not be able to update that week either but, again, I'll try to update what I have after that week. I apologize for the delay!


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